Internal Exile

I'm sure there are many of us out here who had similar experiences when we were being raised in a religious environment. You're taught one thing by your elders but you see things which are a pretty good indication to you they are hypocrites.

It's no wonder so many of us grew up and turned into screwed up adults. The contradictions can be pretty mind boggling. "Do as I say and NOT as I do!" If I had a dime for every time I hear THAT line, I'd be a rich person without any financial worries.

I was raised in a Baptist church until I was 13 years old. Once I moved to another town with my mother and stepfather, it was suddenly okie dokie not to be attending church. I thought, "wow, this is great! No more getting up early on Sunday and getting dressed up! I can just do whatever I want and not have to worry about it!"

That lasted about a month. I realized I missed that environment because it gave me a chance to be with kids my own age (I didn't know anybody in this new town at that point). I used to be very active in the church, both singing and playing the piano. I had made friends with some kids who attended a church and they offered to pick me up on Sunday to attend with them.

I did that for several months. I recall one evening having a knock down, drag out with my mother. I got on her for giving up the church and she said she didn't have to answer to me or anybody else. Wow. After all those years she insisted I go to church, she was suddenly doing an about face. Is that hypocritical? You betcha. It was now more convenient to not attend church, especially considering she had married an atheist! It took me a while to figure that one out, lol

As I got older, I choose to give it up altogether. Why should I bother going to church when my own mother had turned against it. Over the years, the two of us have had our fights about religion and now we simply agree to disagree. Throughout the years I've seen so many people who claim to be Christian on Sunday and live a life not befitting a "good Christian" the rest of the week. There's a bunch of 'em out there.

All that hypocrisy finally turned me against having anything to do with religion. It's something I can live without now because as far as I'm concerned it's all just a big sham.

Now we have another preacher who has been caught having an affair with a gay escort. Sorry but these stories no longer surprise me. I've seen too much firsthand to know this is going on all over the place. People try to suppress who they really are in order to put on their hypocritical stance whenever the church doors are open. I don't need that and frankly will live without it from now on.

AFAIC at this point it's each to his own. If you want to participate in religion, go for it. Just don't give me a hard time because I've seen the light and no longer need that crutch (that's my opinion and I'm sticking to it!). I hope most people can get to a point in their life where they are no longer surprised by these things when they hit the headlines. There are a lot of sexual beings out there masquerading as holier than thou people who neveh eveh engage in anything other than the missionary position. Yeah, right.