The Curmudgeon

Make no mistake about it- the US Senate race in Minnesota is heading to a recount. This portends to have all the fun of a long play date with an at-home DIY dentistry kit sans morphine or even nitrous oxide. The 'story' will be just compelling enough to keep ruminating in the news cycle, but any actual new information will be sparse enough that the reportage by the crack local mainstream media will feel like shadowy after-images of the Great Franken-Coleman Hate Advertising Barrage...

While the Curmudgeon does in his heart want the recount to proceed according to the pre-established rules (because really, everyone who voted deserves to have their vote counted), nonetheless the snide cattiness back-n-forth between the two camps somehow screams for a "pox on both houses" outcome.

Let's face it, folks: Norm the Windsock ain't all that, and Al Franken is definitely flawed at best. This ain't good vs evil, this ain't good guys vs bad guys, this is bought-off banality vs bought-off entitlement.

The Curmudgeon credits the comment section at The Cucking Stool for the inspiration of this solution: send 'em both to share a desk in the Senate. The Curmudgeon insists that while this is a good start, the real solution is to take it one step further:

Fit both Coleman and Franken with choke-chains, linked together on a very short chain. This way, their own antics will likely provide instant correction (not to mention endless voter amusement). Taken as a whole, this solution would provide Minnesota with what we deserve for allowing two such flawed candidates get this far in the process in the first place. Constant squabbling, palpable vacuousness on the issues, and a short list of actually doing anything- yeah that fits the bill.

But mostly I just like to imagine Norman and Al having to live life attached by choke-chains.