Every now and then, the local news media manages to follow a story which is not only not news but also crosses the boundary of the ignorable, crosses the territory of the annoying, and ventures into the area of the dumbfounding. Such has been the case with KARE-11's pursuit of the story of the cow that doesn't seem to moo.
In a nutshell, a person living on a property zoned for livestock (I suppose this could be known otherwise as a farm) has a cow. A neighbor of this person, "Mark" (last name not provided by "Mark") has called the sheriff over 20 times to complain about the cow's mooing. Apparently the cow moos- though in the TWO DAYS of KARE-11's coverage, the cow has yet to utter a peep or a moo.
But there is something about the cow's mooing, according to Mark. He uses words like 'shrill' and 'deep' to describe the moos. Um, okay. Your Curmudgeon holds out a glimmer of hope that Mark was using 'shrill' in the sense of being intemperate.
So, eschewing the issue of the decision at KARE-11 to follow this story not just once but twice, a person who lives on a farm has a cow. And that cow, is said to moo. And the neighbor, who must have at some point in time figured out that farms may be prone to having cows, is pitching a fit over this.
I'd like to take this time to speak directly to "Mark": Dude, you live next to a farm. Farm animals- which are permitted on farms- will make noises. Unless your neighbor is taking the cow onto your property or somehow amplifying the noise directed at your property, you will just have to learn to cope. If you can't cope, then you may need to move, perhaps to an area not zoned for livestock. These areas are called towns, or cities.
If you do move, though, you should check the ordinances, because not every community is zoned for jackasses.
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